Active Listening: Decoding Vs. Understanding (Cognitive Perspective)

Discover the surprising difference between decoding and understanding in active listening from a cognitive perspective.

Step	Action	Novel Insight	Risk Factors
1	Start by paying attention to the speaker‘s verbal and nonverbal cues.	Verbal cues are the words used by the speaker, while nonverbal cues are the body language, tone of voice, and facial expressions.	The risk of misinterpreting the cues is high, especially when the speaker is not clear or consistent in their communication.
2	Use your understanding skills to decode the message.	Understanding skills involve the ability to comprehend, interpret, and analyze the message.	The risk of misinterpreting the message is high, especially when the listener lacks the necessary knowledge or context.
3	Apply the cognitive perspective to understand the speaker’s perspective.	The cognitive perspective involves understanding how the speaker’s thoughts, beliefs, and experiences influence their communication.	The risk of assuming the speaker’s perspective is high, especially when the listener has a different background or worldview.
4	Practice empathy building to connect with the speaker emotionally.	Empathy building involves putting yourself in the speaker’s shoes and feeling what they feel.	The risk of over-identifying with the speaker is high, especially when the listener becomes emotionally overwhelmed or biased.
5	Demonstrate attentive behavior by giving the speaker your full attention.	Attentive behavior involves maintaining eye contact, nodding, and avoiding distractions.	The risk of appearing disinterested or disrespectful is high, especially when the listener is multitasking or interrupting the speaker.
6	Use reflective responses to show that you understand the speaker’s message.	Reflective responses involve paraphrasing, summarizing, and acknowledging the speaker’s feelings.	The risk of sounding robotic or insincere is high, especially when the listener uses the same response repeatedly or without context.
7	Ask clarifying questions to fill in any gaps in your understanding.	Clarifying questions involve asking for more information or examples.	The risk of asking irrelevant or leading questions is high, especially when the listener is not paying attention or is biased.
8	Close the feedback loop by providing feedback to the speaker.	The feedback loop involves giving the speaker your thoughts, feelings, and suggestions.	The risk of giving unsolicited or judgmental feedback is high, especially when the listener is not invited or is not respectful.

Contents

1. What are Understanding Skills and How Do They Relate to Active Listening?
2. What Role do Verbal Cues Play in Understanding During Active Listening?
3. Empathy Building: An Essential Component of Effective Active Listening
4. Reflective Responses: Enhancing Comprehension and Connection through Active Listening
5. The Feedback Loop: Why it Matters in Improving Your Ability to Understand Others through Active Listening
6. Common Mistakes And Misconceptions
7. Related Resources

What are Understanding Skills and How Do They Relate to Active Listening?

Step	Action	Novel Insight	Risk Factors
1	Practice active listening skills	Active listening involves more than just hearing words	Lack of attentiveness
2	Use cognitive perspective to decode and interpret messages	Cognitive perspective involves understanding how people process information	Misinterpretation
3	Demonstrate empathy through nonverbal communication	Nonverbal communication can convey emotions and attitudes	Cultural insensitivity
4	Seek clarification through paraphrasing and summarizing	Paraphrasing and summarizing can help ensure understanding	Miscommunication
5	Provide feedback to confirm understanding	Feedback can help clarify any misunderstandings	Lack of open-mindedness
6	Practice patience and cultural sensitivity	Patience and cultural sensitivity can help build rapport and understanding	Lack of contextual awareness

Understanding skills are the abilities to decode, interpret, and empathize with messages received through active listening. To develop these skills, it is important to use a cognitive perspective to understand how people process information. Additionally, nonverbal communication can convey emotions and attitudes, so it is important to demonstrate empathy through nonverbal cues. Seeking clarification through paraphrasing and summarizing can help ensure understanding, and providing feedback can help confirm understanding. It is also important to practice patience and cultural sensitivity to build rapport and understanding. However, lack of attentiveness, misinterpretation, cultural insensitivity, miscommunication, lack of open-mindedness, and lack of contextual awareness can all be risk factors that hinder understanding skills.

What Role do Verbal Cues Play in Understanding During Active Listening?

Step	Action	Novel Insight	Risk Factors
1	Verbal cues are an important aspect of active listening.	Verbal cues are the words and phrases used by the speaker to convey their message.	Misinterpretation of verbal cues can lead to misunderstandings and breakdowns in communication.
2	Pay attention to the speaker‘s tone, pitch, and inflection.	Tone, pitch, and inflection can convey emotions and attitudes that may not be expressed through words alone.	Over-reliance on tone, pitch, and inflection can lead to misinterpretation of the speaker’s message.
3	Listen for key words and phrases.	Key words and phrases can provide clues to the speaker’s intended meaning.	Focusing too much on key words and phrases can lead to missing the overall message.
4	Paraphrase the speaker’s message.	Paraphrasing can help to ensure that the listener has understood the speaker’s message correctly.	Poor paraphrasing can lead to further misunderstandings.
5	Ask for clarification if necessary.	Clarification can help to clear up any confusion or misunderstandings.	Overuse of clarification can be perceived as a lack of attentiveness or understanding.
6	Summarize the speaker’s message.	Summarizing can help to ensure that the listener has understood the main points of the speaker’s message.	Poor summarization can lead to further misunderstandings.
7	Reflect on the speaker’s message.	Reflection can help the listener to empathize with the speaker and understand their perspective.	Overuse of reflection can be perceived as insincere or patronizing.
8	Provide feedback to the speaker.	Feedback can help the speaker to know that they have been heard and understood.	Poor feedback can be perceived as dismissive or unhelpful.

Empathy Building: An Essential Component of Effective Active Listening

Step	Action	Novel Insight	Risk Factors
1	Perspective-taking	Empathy building requires the listener to take the speaker‘s perspective and understand their emotions and experiences.	The risk of assuming the speaker‘s perspective without validating their feelings and experiences.
2	Non-judgmental attitude	The listener must maintain a non-judgmental attitude towards the speaker’s experiences and emotions.	The risk of projecting one’s own biases and beliefs onto the speaker.
3	Reflective listening	The listener must reflect back on what the speaker has said to ensure that they have understood their perspective accurately.	The risk of misinterpreting the speaker’s words and emotions.
4	Validation	The listener must validate the speaker’s emotions and experiences to build trust and rapport.	The risk of invalidating the speaker’s emotions and experiences, leading to a breakdown in communication.
5	Compassion	The listener must show compassion towards the speaker’s emotions and experiences.	The risk of appearing insincere or patronizing.
6	Cultural sensitivity	The listener must be aware of cultural differences and how they may impact the speaker’s experiences and emotions.	The risk of making assumptions based on cultural stereotypes.
7	Body language awareness	The listener must be aware of the speaker’s body language to understand their emotions and experiences.	The risk of misinterpreting the speaker’s body language.
8	Verbal cues recognition	The listener must recognize verbal cues such as tone of voice and choice of words to understand the speaker’s emotions and experiences.	The risk of misinterpreting the speaker’s verbal cues.
9	Active engagement	The listener must actively engage with the speaker to show that they are listening and interested in their perspective.	The risk of appearing disinterested or distracted.
10	Attentiveness	The listener must be attentive to the speaker’s words and emotions to understand their perspective accurately.	The risk of missing important details or emotions.
11	Open-mindedness	The listener must be open-minded and willing to consider the speaker’s perspective, even if it differs from their own.	The risk of being closed-minded and dismissive of the speaker’s perspective.
12	Trust-building	Empathy building is essential for building trust and rapport with the speaker.	The risk of breaking trust by invalidating the speaker’s emotions and experiences.
13	Self-awareness	The listener must be self-aware of their own biases and beliefs that may impact their ability to empathize with the speaker.	The risk of projecting one’s own biases and beliefs onto the speaker.
14	Patience	Empathy building requires patience and a willingness to listen to the speaker’s perspective without interrupting or rushing them.	The risk of appearing impatient or dismissive of the speaker’s perspective.

Empathy building is an essential component of effective active listening. To build empathy, the listener must take the speaker’s perspective, maintain a non-judgmental attitude, and show compassion towards their emotions and experiences. Reflective listening and validation are also crucial for building trust and rapport with the speaker. Additionally, the listener must be aware of cultural differences, body language, and verbal cues to accurately understand the speaker’s perspective. Open-mindedness, self-awareness, and patience are also important for effective empathy building. However, there are risks associated with empathy building, such as projecting one’s own biases and beliefs onto the speaker or invalidating their emotions and experiences. Therefore, it is important for the listener to be aware of these risks and take steps to mitigate them.

Reflective Responses: Enhancing Comprehension and Connection through Active Listening

Step	Action	Novel Insight	Risk Factors
1	Practice active listening	Active listening involves paying attention to both verbal and nonverbal cues.	The risk of not practicing active listening is that the listener may miss important information or misunderstand the speaker‘s message.
2	Use reflective responses	Reflective responses involve paraphrasing, summarizing, and clarifying questions to enhance comprehension and connection.	The risk of not using reflective responses is that the listener may not fully understand the speaker‘s message or may not feel heard or understood.
3	Show empathy	Empathy involves understanding and sharing the feelings of the speaker.	The risk of not showing empathy is that the speaker may feel dismissed or invalidated.
4	Ask open-ended questions	Open-ended questions encourage the speaker to share more information and can lead to deeper understanding and connection.	The risk of not asking open-ended questions is that the conversation may become one-sided or superficial.
5	Pay attention to body language	Body language can provide important cues about the speaker’s emotions and level of engagement.	The risk of not paying attention to body language is that the listener may miss important nonverbal cues.
6	Provide feedback	Feedback can help the speaker feel heard and understood and can also help the listener clarify any misunderstandings.	The risk of not providing feedback is that the speaker may not feel heard or understood, and the listener may not fully comprehend the message.
7	Practice attentiveness	Attentiveness involves being fully present and engaged in the conversation.	The risk of not practicing attentiveness is that the listener may miss important information or may not fully understand the speaker’s message.

In summary, using reflective responses can enhance comprehension and connection through active listening. By practicing active listening, showing empathy, asking open-ended questions, paying attention to body language, providing feedback, and practicing attentiveness, listeners can improve their listening skills and build stronger relationships with others.

The Feedback Loop: Why it Matters in Improving Your Ability to Understand Others through Active Listening

Step	Action	Novel Insight	Risk Factors
1	Start by actively listening to the speaker.	Active listening involves both decoding and understanding the message being conveyed. Decoding refers to the process of interpreting the verbal and nonverbal cues, while understanding involves comprehending the meaning behind the message.	The risk of misinterpreting the message due to personal biases or assumptions.
2	Use communication skills such as empathy, perception checking, clarification questions, paraphrasing, summarizing, and reflecting feelings to improve your understanding of the message.	Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of another person. Perception checking involves verifying your understanding of the message by asking the speaker to confirm or clarify. Clarification questions seek to clarify specific aspects of the message. Paraphrasing involves restating the message in your own words. Summarizing involves providing a brief overview of the message. Reflecting feelings involves acknowledging and validating the speaker’s emotions.	The risk of overwhelming the speaker with too many questions or comments, which can hinder effective communication.
3	Use open-ended questions to encourage the speaker to provide more information and closed-ended questions to seek specific details.	Open-ended questions allow the speaker to provide more detailed information and encourage them to share their thoughts and feelings. Closed-ended questions seek specific details and can be useful in clarifying specific aspects of the message.	The risk of using closed-ended questions too frequently, which can limit the speaker’s ability to express themselves fully.
4	Provide feedback to the speaker to confirm your understanding of the message and to show that you are actively listening.	The feedback loop involves providing feedback to the speaker to confirm your understanding of the message and to show that you are actively listening. This can help to improve communication and build trust between the speaker and listener.	The risk of providing feedback that is not accurate or that does not reflect the speaker’s intended message.
5	Repeat the process of active listening, using communication skills, and providing feedback until you have a clear understanding of the message.	Active listening is an ongoing process that requires continuous effort and attention. By repeating the process of active listening, using communication skills, and providing feedback, you can improve your ability to understand others and build stronger relationships.	The risk of becoming complacent and assuming that you understand the message without actively listening or seeking clarification.

Common Mistakes And Misconceptions

Mistake/Misconception	Correct Viewpoint
Decoding and understanding are the same thing.	Decoding refers to the process of interpreting verbal and nonverbal cues, while understanding involves comprehending the meaning behind those cues. Active listening requires both decoding and understanding.
Active listening is a passive activity.	Active listening is an intentional and engaged process that requires effort on the part of the listener to focus their attention on what is being said, interpret it accurately, and respond appropriately. It is not a passive activity where one simply hears what is being said without any conscious effort or engagement.
Listening means only hearing words spoken by someone else.	Listening involves more than just hearing words; it also includes paying attention to nonverbal cues such as body language, tone of voice, facial expressions, etc., which can convey important information about how someone feels or what they mean beyond their actual words. Effective active listening requires attending to both verbal and nonverbal communication from others in order to fully understand their message.
Good listeners always agree with what they hear.	Being a good listener does not necessarily mean agreeing with everything that is said; rather it means showing respect for other people’s opinions even if you do not share them yourself, asking questions for clarification when needed, summarizing key points made by others so that everyone understands them clearly before moving forward in discussions or decision-making processes together as a team.
Multitasking during conversations doesn’t affect active listening skills.	Multitasking during conversations can negatively impact active listening skills because it divides your attention between multiple tasks at once instead of focusing solely on what someone else is saying in real-time conversation mode . This can lead to missing important details or misinterpreting messages conveyed by others due to distractions caused by multitasking activities like checking emails/texts/social media notifications while talking with someone else simultaneously.

Related Resources

Embodied understanding.